In the business scene, many people attach great importance to communication skills. Many people take lessons on how to speak and give presentations so that they can convey what they want to convey correctly. But in fact, the author says that people are judged by their visual impression even before they speak.
In communication, in addition to linguistic communication using words, there is also "nonverbal communication", which mainly refers to the impression of appearance such as gestures, postures, facial expressions, and attire. Many people think that "you should not judge by appearance", but everyone judges whether you can trust that person or whether you can work as a business person from the first impression of appearance. .. And it takes a lot of effort to overturn that impression.
Even if you improve your linguistic communication, if you give a negative impression to the other person before you talk, you will give up your chance. This book focuses on "nonverbal communication," which has not received much attention in Japan, and introduces specific improvement measures and training methods for each item such as gestures, clothing, facial expressions, and voice. As a business appearance consultant, the author has dramatically changed the "appearance" of tens of thousands of people, so the reliability is outstanding.
By practicing the contents of this book, the impression you give to others will change immediately. And as a trusted business person, you will be able to produce results.
The main points of this book
The impact of the first impression is great. Most of that impression comes from nonverbal communication, such as appearance, behavior, and behavior.
Facial expressions are a material for judging what kind of person the other person is, what kind of situation they are in, and what they think. I want to control my facial expression and not mislead the other person.
It can be said that nonverbal communication is ultimately a concern for the other party. And it can be a message that he is a person who pays close attention to his work.
Your impression depends on how surprisingly it looks
Impression is determined by nonverbal communication
Everyone judges people visually. The first impression has a particularly large effect. If the first impression is bad, it will take a lot of effort to overturn it.
People's impressions are created by linguistic communication and nonverbal communication such as appearance, behavior, and behavior. The ratio is 35% for linguistic communication and 65% for nonverbal communication. In other words, nonverbal communication is overwhelmingly important.
Is the content more important than the appearance?
Many business people are visually impaired, such as twisted suits, discolored shoes, curled back, unconfident posture, and wrinkles between the eyebrows that seem to be in a bad mood. They seem to think that "what you need at work is not the appearance, but the content."
But if you're wearing a twisted suit and someone wearing a crisp suit, the latter will look overwhelmingly superior. No matter how good the content is, if the first impression is negative, you may not even get the chance to see the achievements.
When it comes to "appearance," it's not just the outfit that you should be aware of. Various factors such as behavior, gestures, facial expressions, voices, place and time settings, etc. influence each other to form a person's impression. All of them are called "nonverbal communication".
"Unfortunate impression" made without knowing
How to stand and walk that gives a negative impression
Unknowingly, it can give an impression that you never thought of. For example, how to stand. Even if I think I'm standing upright, sometimes my neck is sticking out. Such a standing appearance gives the impression of being poor, unconfident, and unhealthy.
How to walk is also important. Inappropriate walking, such as slow walking speed, narrow stride length, or looking down, gives the impression of lack of confidence, moody, or reluctance.
It is not limited to special situations such as presentations that you should be aware of how to walk. This is because the sloppy way of walking imprints a bad impression on the people around you without knowing it.
Surprising points seen during the interview
One place where the impression comes from is a hiring interview with a company. Of particular importance in an interview is "10 seconds to sit in a chair." It can be said that acceptance or rejection is decided in these 10 seconds. I tend to try hard to appeal myself, but what I really see is nonverbal communication such as appearance, posture, walking style, facial expressions, and behavior.
In some cases, the person in charge at the site may act as an interviewer rather than a professional interviewer such as personnel. They will place more importance on "impression". In other words, does it look like someone you want to welcome as your subordinate?
In addition to the interview, the attitude at the reception desk of the company is also important. If there is a person who is rude to the receptionist, it is natural that he / she will be recognized as his true nature.
Changes in appearance give you a chance
It is said that the feeling of the heart appears on the face, but on the contrary, the facial expression may affect the feeling. If you try to laugh forcibly when something is unpleasant, you may feel better.
Similarly, even if it's difficult to be happy or confident right away, it's a good idea to change your behavior and appearance first. Since the behavior and appearance are parts that are easy for people to see, changes can be communicated at a glance. If you can feel that your eyes have changed, that feeling will change you and give you confidence.
Unlike the inside, changes in appearance are easily transmitted to the surroundings. If you change your appearance, you will have the opportunity to understand yourself correctly and to be called out from all directions.[Must read point!] Manipulate impressions with "behavior"
Always be aware of facial expressions
Facial expressions are a material for judging what kind of person the other person is, what kind of situation they are in, and what they think. The flip side is that if you don't control your facial expressions, you'll give an unintended impression and you may be misunderstood.
However, it is difficult for me to know what kind of facial expression I have on a daily basis and what kind of habit I have. The author recommends keeping a small mirror on the desk at work. That way, you can see your unconscious expression, which is different from when you consciously look in the mirror. Then correct the facial expression. It is also effective to ask a close person if there is something wrong with your facial expression or habit.
Use different voice tone and speed
In nonverbal communication, "voice" is an important factor along with posture, gesture, and facial expression. There are four factors that determine the impression of voice: "tone (height)", "speed", "smooth tongue", and "voice volume". By properly using these depending on the situation, the impression given by the voice can be changed.
The atmosphere of voice can be divided into four types with "tone" on the vertical axis and "speed" on the horizontal axis. There are "understanding priority type" that speaks slowly in high tone, "passion type" that speaks quickly in high tone, "honest type" that speaks slowly in low tone, and "skill type" that speaks quickly in low tone.
First and foremost, it's important to understand what type of conversation you normally have. Then, adjust the tone and speed according to the scene to change the impression.
Manipulate impressions with "preparation"
Respect personal space
The "preparation" that the author refers to in this book is an element of "place" and "time." "Place" refers to the sense of distance, the position to sit, how to choose a meeting place or a restaurant for dinner. "Time" refers to the timing of visits, emails, telephone calls, and how to use time.
One of the ways to manipulate the impression in the "place" is "a sense of distance" that does not impose a psychological burden. Humans have a "personal space," and when someone approaches beyond that, they feel anxious and uncomfortable. Personal space varies depending on the person and situation, but in the Japanese business scene, it is safe to assume that the distance at which you can stretch your arms and touch the other person is too close.
The sense of distance is invisible, but it has a surprisingly large impact. How to get a sense of distance is an important point in communication.
Act early and be aware of early
Even one speed of replying to an email tells you how to spend your time. If you can't get back the details right away, try to reply just because you received it.
Appointments are the same. Let's say you have an appointment from 10 o'clock. For summer appointments, if you arrive at the reception just before, you may not be able to stop sweating at 10 o'clock. In such a case, it will be difficult to calmly communicate. It may cause the other party to say, "Please take your time," and it lacks cleanliness and cannot give a very good impression.
To prevent this from happening, I would like to arrive nearby before the appointment, at least 15 minutes before. That way, you'll have time to calm down and prepare.
Manipulate the impression with "other"
Cleanliness is the most important thing in "dressing". Even a single stain on your tie can be labeled as "a person without a sense of cleanliness." Keeping that in mind, it is important to check it and wash and clean it as needed.
In addition to stains and stains, "Hachigen" is said to greatly affect the sense of cleanliness. These are the eight "sources" of "eyes," "mouth," "ears," "collar," "chest," "hands," "knees," and "foot." If even one of these is missing, the cleanliness will drop at once. As a result, trust may be compromised. It is important to keep Yagen conscious and clean.
Pay attention to the smell
It is said that the "smell" appeals to the most primitive parts of the brain among the five senses. It is also the smell that remains in memory for the longest time. In other words, if the smell gives a bad impression to the other party, it is fatal. If you're not careful, you can unknowingly give the worst impression.
However, my smell is hard to notice by myself. That's why you should check with someone you have a close relationship with. Always be aware of cleanliness and change your shirt every day. I also want to be careful about the smell of cigarettes.
"Caring for people" is the basis of everything
Say hello refreshingly
You can control your own impression by adjusting the appearance, but the basis is consideration for the other party. Manipulating one's impression by adjusting the appearance is actually a courtesy and concern for the other person. And being able to care about the appearance can also be a message that you are a person who is also careful about your work.
The basis of caring for people is "greeting." Many people realize that a single greeting can make a big difference in your impression. That's why, let's say hello with a nice smile. Regardless of your position, if you say hello from yourself, you can definitely make a good impression.
Also, when greeting, try to call the other person's name. Remember the name as soon as possible, not just the title, and call by name. Make sure you keep your name in mind the first time you exchange business cards, and call it by name the next time you meet. This is also a concern for the other party.
Recommendation of reading
In this book, the tips of nonverbal communication that give a good impression to the other party are presented in an easy-to-understand manner, using figures and illustrations, and the experiences of the author who was active as a CA of Singapore Airlines. By reading this book and putting it into practice, you will be able to improve your impression in the business scene.